manic-depressive?

salam,

dalam 2-3 hari ni, aku selalu terfikir-fikir-fikirkan banyak perkara. tak tau kenapa. it is as if my mind has decided to stop for a while and think about many things.
things i did not do previously.
things i have not achieved.
things i keep delaying to do.
things i want to do but i cant do because...
things i should have but i do not.
things i wish would have happened this way instead of that way.

i feel sad. i feel tired. i feel without a will. i feel numb. i feel like giving up. i feel like surrendering to the emotions now and go into the water...
sinking down.
and drowning.
and letting go of life.

i know what this is. i have a cyclical depression problem. and, like any other people who suffers from depression, i dont know what else to do other than letting myself self-destruct.

friends, promise me, just remember me as the friend who is always there for you, who is always smiling and helpful to you, who cheers up the group when we hang out together... as the friend who is always like an angel taking care of you, ya?


oh, i love this song... selalu dengar lagu ni again and again at the office :)